The assumption with an arranged marriage is that you have close people to verify the credentials of the other person. But there are times when it does not work. The girls family should sue the boys family for cheating her.
I think we have to evolve to the changing scenario. Todays brides are much more educated and ambitious than ones of 90s. So to get in to the knot based on parental ambitions ultimately is bound to have problems. the generation gap comes in. It is far better to have at least 6 months engagement period. In the mean time the couple can try to communicate and identify the source of potential problems to each other. If things are not going well better call of the marriage. It is a bad thing to suspend an engagement but it is much better than a divorce and much much better than to adjust with the wrong person. Instead of going with all iz well, or all will become well better is think practically and make a right decision. If you beleive in zodiacs instead of your own senses then better leave the rest of life also to the zodiacs... thats all i will say.
Arranged Marriages? Bah! Selecting suitable "CANDIDATES" from photographs, attending a CHOREOGRAPHED meeting where TEA/COFFEE is served and then sharing a bed and sleeping with a virtual stranger, all in the name of preserving CASTE, CREED, RELIGION & CULTURE! In today's times & sensibilities, how can people have "ARRANGED" ......!
Re: Recognize it for what it is- a MEAT market!
by raghu rao on Nov 09, 2012 10:31 PM
what do you prefer ? living with her for a few days and see if her size fits yours and then marry her ?
Re: Re: Successful Married life
by Jai Neo on Nov 09, 2012 09:50 PM
Arranged marriage is just a convenient way of pairing off the the unwanted & leftover men/women who would not have found partners otherwise! It is better to have loved & lost to not have LOVED at all!
some regret after marriage but some regret batchelor's life at the fag end of the life. what is better regret without marriage or after marriage ? This is true that for successful married life one has to adjust with one's indivisuality. Adjustment is another key word for successful married life. Arguments are the part of married life, but it creates problems if ego of indivisual is hurt, or one partner is a cheater. Inspite of all checks, one may feel disappointed after getting married, take it as part of life and tolrate it if feasible . Indivisual's luck also play a improtant part, you are lucky if you get your choice, but married life is a continous process , hence bumps and hurdles may come . First 3-4 years are crucial after marriage and they set the direction of one's married life.Marriage is a institution where two peronalities come together to act as one whether superficially or in reality. Lot more can be said, about love marriage or arranged marriage , but luck also plays vital role in indivisual life. One should accept it if one can't change it. So it is life. And life is a continuume of experiences , they can be bad or good , try to be observer , instead of carried away by them.
Mathces are made in heaven, be it arranged or love marriage. It depends on karma of your previous births and your destination in current.
Marriages last with bit sacrifices, mutual understanding, no communication gaps, no ego and commitment to last long. I have seen older generations (my relatives), when in this type of glitches in marriages, couple lived seperately, but during his end days, husband came back to his wife, asked her apology for wrong doing. Such powerful is the bondage of marriage. One Should look in to marriage as a sacred bondage, duty, responsibility etc, should forgive and ask for forgiveness leaving egos aside, then definately marriages, be it arranged or love, last long...
Re: Matches are made in Heaven...
by Amarendra prasad on Nov 11, 2012 11:05 PM
marriages do not depend on karma or kurma, its the human jealousy which soils onces career and ruins their life.
over expectations, false commitents, not doing background check of the bride/Groom and blindly trusting others.
does there exist a thing called love. i doubt. only money, beauty, wealth, job, and infatuation brings a boy and girl close. otherwise why so called love married couple seek divorce. no real companion in life.
Re: does there exist a thing called love
by raghu rao on Nov 09, 2012 10:37 PM
Right ! No real companion in life. Only your hands go with you till the end.
Nice Article. But as you have changed Name to protect privacy, you should not show Pictures of real persons too. Instead you can show Dummy characters as shown in rest of the Pictures.
Since I am single, i am more than qualified to talk a few things about successful marriage.
Arranged marriage or Love marriage is literally like suicide or supari killing. But either ways...get to really know the person first as a friend...see how they treat their parents, people around them, their peers, subordinates, thoughts. This whole "talk for 5 mins" thing is utter nonsense. How can you decide whether you wish to spend your entire life with that person by just talking for 5 mins....i bet even Hitler would come across as 'totally hot and cute and charming' if you just talked to him for 5 mins. If it's love, rely on your heart, but don't forget your brain and gut. If something about it feels off....or your parents or friends totally don't like your 'love', you need to sit back and analyse things.
Marry a person you can be yourself around...and who knows the worst part of you and still loves you. Don't marry unless you are financially independent - both guys n gals. Talk about how you both will be raising kids...and who'll take a career sabbatical. But above all, take time to really know the person and whether your personality it compatible and whether you both 'click'. Don't be in a rush to marry. Take your time in finding the right match....as it's a biiiiiiiiiiig step!!
I've seen both love and arranged marriage fail...and equally.
Re: marriage
by satya prakash on Nov 09, 2012 04:05 PM
what about if it fails after marriage.one key word is missing in whole article-and that is adjustment.Life is all about compromises.The earlier we understand,the better it is.
