Vanitha, in the article has brought it on her own head. If she had spent quality time with her partner before marriage, he would have told her about past relationship and the forcing of parents. I know how hypocritical girls from chennai are. They never come out and spend time with groom before marriage citing "Tradition". There is no point in crying later.
Dear friends, marriage is a partnership between two unlikely minds coming together and make it a success. I married my childhood sweetheart and we completed 30 years of married life. We still have the same passion, love, understanding, sacrifice for each other when we decided to get married. one just have to feel the love towards your partner. I like my childhood sweetheart and we love each other very much. my passion for her still remains. thank you
I have seen both love and arranged marriages fail. In one marriage in my family, my cousin was married in an arranged marriage to a girl. And after some months we came to know that the girl had a history of mental illness. She used to go into depression and psychic behaviour regularly. So it is always better to check from a third party.
Re: It is all about luck
by Deshbhakth Hindu on Nov 13, 2012 10:27 PM
And in India mental illness is still a taboo and the parents and relatives will never speak about it in public.
Re: Re: It is all about luck
by Sheetal Kaur on Nov 13, 2012 11:27 PM
Going into depression is not a mental illness, it is common syndrome in women and needs to be understood. Given time and support will get the person out of depression and lead a perfectly normal life. depression in a women can be due to child birth, menopause to name but two. It just needs to be understood by the partner and the family. At the best it is not a mental disorder.
I've seen my friends.. who were play boys.. had many GFs ... still choose to marry their parent's choice... same with Girls .... Some workout... some regret.. Its all in our Attitude..
Marriage is a sacred institute where both partners should involve and be sincere in building up a committed relationship for themselves and forever. In most of the cases it is the in laws greed / influence that fail an arranged marriage but in love the reason in most of the cases is loss of trust or high expectations. Like any career or business both should invest in time, trust, appreciation and love for lasting relationship. Both should give up ego first accept the truth / short comings if any without any greed. This is the secret of our twenty five years married life still going strong. Men should be more giving and understanding than the girls in building the family.
Whatever are the stats for Arranged and love marriages, I personally believe that marriage is an obsolete institution, which if it does not reinvent itself, is headed for the dustbin. I myself am in an arranged marriage within the same caste/sub-caste. Even if I had, had a love marriage, I would feel suffocated. In any partnership, one partner very obviously emerges as stronger/smarter or what-ever-you-might want to call it. How the weak partner reacts to this and how teh strong partner manages this partnership is what will decide it the marriage is successful or a failure.
Re: Marriage is an obsolete concept...
by Krishna on Nov 12, 2012 11:05 AM
A blind man marrying a deaf or dumb woman might be successful as they will complement each other and will be totally dependent on each other. So eligible individuals might as well know themselves better before deciding to marry....
