Whatever are the stats for Arranged and love marriages, I personally believe that marriage is an obsolete institution, which if it does not reinvent itself, is headed for the dustbin. I myself am in an arranged marriage within the same caste/sub-caste. Even if I had, had a love marriage, I would feel suffocated. In any partnership, one partner very obviously emerges as stronger/smarter or what-ever-you-might want to call it. How the weak partner reacts to this and how teh strong partner manages this partnership is what will decide it the marriage is successful or a failure.
Re: Marriage is an obsolete concept...
by Krishna on Nov 12, 2012 11:05 AM
A blind man marrying a deaf or dumb woman might be successful as they will complement each other and will be totally dependent on each other. So eligible individuals might as well know themselves better before deciding to marry....
Arranged marriages, at least, in the urban context and in these times, are an outdated concept.
Arranged marriages worked in the past due to family pressure or attention and societal compulsions.
As India's modern society loosens its adherence to its "family values", arranged marriages are bound to go the way of the dodo!
The only reason arranged marriages take place these days is because there are Indian men who either cannot socialize to get to know somebody from the opposite gender due to lack of communication skills or time and because there are Indian girls who don't want to take the responsibility of the failure of their marriages on themselves.
Arranged marriages pose lower risks from the responsibility of making the marriage work perspective!
Re: Re: Re: Out dated
by xxx yyy on Nov 14, 2012 04:54 AM
I agree with you, this is one of the best answers I have seen. In most arranged marriages, the girl and boy do not even spend 40 hours to get to know each other before getting married, yet have all sorts of high expectations from each other.
1)90% plus indian still go for arragned ones 2)% of divorce cases of love much much higher in case of love marriages. 3)name me one genius born out of love marriage?
Re: Love marriages carry no advantages
by Li Na on Nov 12, 2012 01:53 AM
1) 90% indians go for arranged ones...tell the percentage of them who are happy....arranged marriage is equally fail-able as love marriage. 2) % of divorce cases of much higher than love - coz ppl who get into marry as per their will have a ballz....and will walk out if it doesn't work. Chances of marriage being successful and happy is pretty much the same in case of love or arranged. 3) Name me one genius born out of arranged marriage?? Americans marry for love....and there are far more successful brilliant people in america than india NOW. Actually, there is a better shot of offspring of a couple who married for love to be a bright kid...as our genes largely and subconsciously are calculating the "perfect mate" who would create the perfect, superior offspring. Genes are only bothered about fighting a suitable genes to "carry it forward"....but at this point, one should determine whether it would be good for us too.
Actually India was far more accepting of love marriage a few centuries back - India celebrates love of "radha and krishna". krishna eloped with rukmini to marry her. krishna encouraged his sister - subhadra to run away with arjuna whom she loved, rana pratap eloped with queen to marry her. Arranged marriage is a recent norm. India historically encouraged love marriage - swayamvara is an example of it....woman picked a var (groom) for herself.
Even sage Manu encouraged women to find a mate for herself and not rely on parents.
No stastical procedures, no analyses! Take one example and generalize it! While advising people about arranged marriages, also give statistics on the success rate of the so called non-arranged marriages. Will you? Vested western interests want to break down the Indian family structure and Indian media are their paid agents.
Marriage is personal affair. Our age old society has built certain methodology from choosing a groom to conducting it. Just because few cases go wrong does not mean we have to castigate the entire system. Those who wish to go outside the set process and battle their own lives they are welcome to it. But as rule if they canvass against such measures the move should be censured and the perpetrators to be clearly made to mind their own business. In a democracy one can point out the pros and cons but no one has a right to decide on others prerogatives or their rights.
The present day arranged marriages are no more a reliable act, as the persons personal character cant be judged in few meetings, as the multiple personalities is difficult to expose!? by the time commitment is completed the hard facts is really impossible to endured The brides are often put to horrible life because of Natural imbalance in women hood to that of a man, though he no more deserve the tag Man. There are many reasons which only a brilliant mind can read through Horoscope is missing to day. Education,caste,social and economic conditions cant come to rescue bad character of cheating instinct, because of lack of ethical and moral education,Where the money alone the front runner in life and not joy and peace.
Re: Marriage?! women Should be extra cautious always.
by ramakant on Nov 11, 2012 08:10 AM
men should be more cautious. Girls have boyfriends and run away with their boyfriends after marriage. Before getting married one should confirm that there are no pre-existing love affairs. Why mess up many lives?
Re: Re: Marriage?! women Should be extra cautious always.
by Bala krishna on Dec 03, 2012 05:55 PM
Horoscope is not the non sense but the reading made is.
Re: hi
by Astro San on Nov 12, 2012 11:49 AM
Well said Partha - Iam 42 and have decided to be single my whole life. It is much better as you are responsible only for yourself, no one to nag you 24 hours !
