Easy jobs. Today's girls are more interested staying away from house-hold chores and raising kids. that is the truth. Some guys too want money money. Have no shame flaunting their wives in figure hugging clothes and feel as if they are superiors and westerners. Shame on this generation. There are many good working girls too but pretty less in number. Forget the daughter-in-law the son's too do not bother of their sick parents. Result we may have money and EGOs but the quality of life is pathetic. I challenge how many mothers know to sing lullabies today?
Re: Greed and selfish
by san on Dec 12, 2011 02:54 PM
well said my friend, We are heading towards a valueless nation like the countries in the west. I had seen umpteen no of times that grandparents go to USA only to babysit their grandkids. Most of them are not called for when they dont have kids. Grandparents are used and abused so much. First of all they raised us and now we want them to raise our kids? so whats our work then. Its high time we take responsibility of our lives and raise our children and also make sure that we take care of our parents. They dedicated 20 years of their lives for us and its our time to dedicated 20 yrs our lives for them. Lets be humane and think with emotions and logic.
Re: !!!
by Argumentative Indian on Dec 12, 2011 11:26 AM
Hopefully, our children will give us a better perspective, when they grow up and treat us, a lot worse than we treated our parents.
Re: Re: !!!
by san on Dec 12, 2011 02:57 PM
Whatever good we do we get 50% of it back to us. Whatever bad we do we will get 200% of back to us. So our kids will treat us like beggers if we dont treat our parents properly.Can we sit and think for few mins of how much sacrifices our parents have done for us and dont these things motivate us to look after our parents. If not we are not fit to be called as human beings.
We are heading towards a valueless nation like the countries in the west. I had seen umpteen no of times that grandparents go to USA only to babysit their grandkids. Most of them are not called for when they dont have kids. Grandparents are used and abused so much. First of all they raised us and now we want them to raise our kids? so whats our work then. Its high time we take responsibility of our lives and raise our children and also make sure that we take care of our parents. They dedicated 20 years of their lives for us and its our time to dedicated 20 yrs our lives for them. Lets be humane and think with emotions and logic.
Re: !!!
by Ganesh V on Dec 12, 2011 12:18 PM
Yes, we are getting selfish...that's the sad part. Nobody is thinking about parents but they are thinking about childrens only. Once the parents duty is over, they are put into old age homes. Sad state of affairs.
I have brought up in joint family, staying with my parents; chacha; chach\'s; taujis. we are totall 21 people sahring 1 Kitchen and recently i have blessed with a son whom i dont have to woory as they all are there to care for him. Its just req understanding and some sacrifices to live in a joint family. End result is happiness. In joint family, a small festivels looks like a big event. I realy thanks god that he gives me a joint family :)
Re: Its Very Good
by deepak shukla on Dec 12, 2011 12:15 PM
You are indeed lucky, Vishal. I too want to live in a joint family with my parents and one younger brother. Both of us brother are married and blessed with children. My wife has no objection but my devrani(younger brother's wife) is not so much compatible to adjust with a Joint family. That's why my wish of living in a joint family will remain as a wish only...
JOINT FAMILY NO DOUBT WONDERFUL. NOWADAYS BOTH CHILDREN AND PARENTS KNOW HOW TO LIVE. THOSE DAYS THERE WAS NOT MUCH OF UNDERSTANDING AND EGO DOMINATED. IF THE PARENTS REALISING THAT THEIR CHILDREN ARE NO LONGER CHILDREN, THEY HAVE ALSO CHILDREN, DONT INTERFERE IN EACH AND EVERYTHING LIFE WILL BE WONDERFUL FOR ALL. PARENTS ARE LIKE REFERENCE BOOK AND THEY HAVE TO ACT WHEN THERE IS CRISIS. OTHERWISE FOR DAILY ROUTINE THY HAVE TO BE HALPFUL AND THE CHILDREN ALSO HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF THEM, ATTEND TO THEIR NEEDS ETC. I AM A VERY SUCCESSFUL F-IN-LAW AND I TREAT MY Ds-IN-LAW AS MORE THAN MY DAUGHTERS. UNNECESSARY EGO WILL SPOIL THE RELATIONSHIP.
Re: here is why ...........................................
by x t on Dec 12, 2011 02:28 PM
you are right.. too much possessiveness and insecurities on both sides( wife as well as parents' side) kills joint family concept..
Only rediff can do such things. In another article posted today rediff says that it is unimaginable to stay with 7 strangers in a single apartment all of a sudden and a girl on marriage has to precisely do this; so joint family system is not liked by newly-weds. In this article it says many prefer joint family to independent living. Which is correct?
Re: Strange articles
by Argumentative Indian on Dec 12, 2011 11:25 AM
Both are correct. The joint family is just another organization, and its success or failure, if one may call it such, depends upon the group dynamics and behaviour of the organization cohesively. Some of the below points affect the outcome:
A] IN - LAWS 1) Most importantly how educated are they? NOT how QUALIFIED. 2) How much do they respect a young person, regardless of whether it is their daughter in law or son, or a stranger, remember, respect is a behaviour, not a state of mind. 3) What do the expect from the DIL? 4) How well do they communicate? 5) How exploitative are they? Do they look upon a DIL as a free maid servant? Or a provider of extra money?
A] DAUGHTER -IN - LAW 1) Again how educated & open minded is she? 2) What are her expectations? 3) How willing is she to imbibe the existing norms a new organization before proceeding to change those norms? 4) How exploitative is she? Does she look upon her In - Laws as unpaid male & female servants? Does she look upon them as temporary burdens, to be borne till the family inheritance accrues? 5) How much do they respect the elderly?
its getting really difficult surviving alone nowdays. In our case we have two set of OLD parents and if one of them gets ill our whole system FLOPS. we are running between two houses and further planning for Kids seems all the more difficult. Joint family is a blessing coz at-least all ur parents are in front of your eyes and you can take care of them and vice versa too..
Re: i agree
by gururajan on Dec 12, 2011 11:13 AM
Govt.both central and state don't support issueless govt. servants. if a govt. servant has children and gets sterilised, he or she gets financial incentive by way of increments or promotion. Whereas an issuelss couple who are govt. servants is not given any incentive during their service. This is a peculiar govt. rule.
Need someone to take care of the children and cook for you while you spend endless hours at "work", Try the new joint family, it easy and convinient. Truly an ideal choice for the SELFISH generation. Why do both parents need to work even when children are toddlers, ego clashes, assertion of independence, and just plain self centered mentality even among couples. How shameful !!
Re: Re: All for selfish reasons
by tin tin on Dec 12, 2011 11:31 AM
True well said, But iother way around if parents are at distance then we may not be able to know their health,they are idled too. Best equation comes when you want them to be with you bcoz you love them then its a perfect case, they neednot take care of children, rather we have a chance to take care of them when they live with us, but its a typical Indian case the parents bnever come out of the town they are living, and young couples cant find their jobs being in the town!!
