I married for love; my husband (then boy friend) was earning very less (in fact less than me}and there was no potential for big money in sight; but I did not care much for money; now also I am OK with less money. However, as the things turned out, within few years of marriage, he started doing very well in his co and started earning big salary after getting quick promotions. It appears he is a go getter and gets the things done. But rediff will not publish such success stories, it does not have the requisite drama
Re: dont do it
by Gold Castle on Jun 09, 2009 11:34 AM
I agree, marrying for money is'nt a good idea. It lacks transparency, affection and love. Its not worth it. Money cant buy everything in life !!
Even if someone pays 10 lakhs to his son in law , greedy urban parent in laws/wives are twisting arms of son in law to extract 10 times the money that they have spent in their daughter's marraige.
Re: Article 498a and domestic violence acts are legal terrorism
by Sukhmeet Singh on Jul 15, 2009 08:30 PM
I fully agree with you. Even if no dowry is exchanged the girl and her parents use sec. 498 to harass the boy & his family.
Most important for personal satisfaction is to marry on your terms , could be for money or love or partly both . Money can buy a lot in this material world and is definitely the fourth need after food , cloth , shelter to sail thru life journey . Love could be everlasting hence cannot be overlooked for money for something as important as once in a lifetime marriage . Life in a palace could be miserable if partner is not compatible , similarly life could be difficult if bank balance is zero and your beloved keeps cribbing . For marital bliss is needed a balance between love & money with love being the more important constituent .
Re: Re: Happily Ever After
by Dipti Andhale on Aug 14, 2009 09:36 PM
I have seen few people who are used to a certain lifestyle and just to make sure they lead a better lifestyle especially after marriage, have actually got hitched to a wealthy partner. Guess such people are insecure about their own abilities and going for money over love is one of the sure ways to ensure their future security. After all love in marriage...well only time can tell!
At Age 10, parents forced to study hard and hard, so as to score 1st rank in the class (no matter what the class strenght/level is like and no matter whether you mug up or understand and apply logic)...They said "work hard now, you will enjoy tommorow" and I did.
Then at Age 15, parents forced you to study even harder and harder, stop watching TV, stop reading Magazines, Stop chatting with friends/relatives, so as to get into a good institution for studies. They said "work hard now, you will enjoy tommorow" and I did.
At 22, after graduation, parents/team leaders forced you to work hard and hard so that you can settle down ( ??? ). They said "work hard now, you will enjoy tommorow" and I did.
At 28, got married and wife takes the adivsor role. Wife says, work hard and hard now, so that we have a stable financial life and that whether you like ur job or not, just obey your bosses and we will be good. They said "work hard now, you will enjoy tommorow" and I did.
At 40, Wife says, work even harder as we have a kid to grow up and that you need to be having bank balance ready. They said "work hard now, you will enjoy tommorow" and I did.
At 55, Work hard and hard, so that you can marry off your children to good families and your life will be complete.They said "work hard now, you will enjoy tommorow" and I did.
And After retirment, I turn back and see my life, I was just working hard and hard, not SMART. and I never really njoyed life and never will. cont..
Re: Tommorow never comes !!!
by abc_xyz abc_xyz on Jun 02, 2009 05:35 PM
cont...
I kept working like a mad dog to EARN my life and never enjoyed it. Even after retirment, people said "work hard now, you will enjoy tommorow" and NOW I ASKED THIS QUESTION WHY ??? but it was too late ..as I have a fat tummy, diabetics, high BP, astham trouble etc etc and I have to work hard to live !!!!
This is life. Its upto to enjoy the various stages of it, with little compromised on your growth path.
You didn't decide your birth. You can't decide your death. You didn't decide your parents. You didn't decide your colour. You didn't decide your beauty. BUT YOU CAN DECIDE THE TIME BETWEEN YOUR LIFE AND DEATH.
Re: Re: Tommorow never comes !!!
by ram kumar on Jun 02, 2009 06:00 PM
Welcome to the debt economy my friend. The sooner you realize you are nothing but a glorified slave to the central banks, you will stop feeling so bad.
Guys, I am a 26 year old bachelor, and my parents are looking for a suitable bride for me. Going by the current trend, I am worried that I may end up with a gold-digger in the form of a woman. How to find out whether a woman is really after our money, and how to stay away from such women? Please advise
Re: I am a worried bachelor!
by Pranab M on Jun 04, 2009 10:23 AM
Article 498a and domestic violence acts are legal terrorism.
Even if someone pays 10 lakhs to his son in law , greedy urban parent in laws/wives are twisting arms of son in law to extract 10 times the money that they have spent in their daughter's marraige.
Re: I am a worried bachelor!
by Commenter on Jun 02, 2009 03:11 PM
Rohan , first tell me at the age of 26 do you need your parents to find a girl for you?Dont you have the capability to find one for yourself?If not then you have to go with whatever is in store for your with the girl of your parents choice.
Re: I am a worried bachelor!
by Utpal Parekh on Jun 02, 2009 02:52 PM
Why do you want to stay away from such women?? It is these women who are precisely the most attractive..lets face it!! If a girl is smart, beautiful and intelligent, there will be lots of guys chasing her....why do you want to back away from competition??
On the other hand, those women who are plain janes have no one chasing them...do you want to end up with such a girl?? for all you know, she might be a bigger gold digger and an absolutely low level person with weak character..
So, the best is to go for a girl who is smart and beautiful and ensure than you measure up in your career or business......and work very hard in life to keep her happy..
All women are gold diggers..it is just that some have to compromise due to average looks while some girls get it all due to their beauty and brains.....
Re: Re: I am a worried bachelor!
by Tall Male on Jun 03, 2009 08:16 PM
If all women are gold diggers, why is the society not terming them as dowry seekers? Isn't that dowry in reverse? If dowry is bad, so is good digging by women!
Re: I am a worried bachelor!
by insan on Jun 02, 2009 02:57 PM
Rohan...just for one week do this 1:- Stop giving any gifts to her. 2:- Dont take her to any restaurant. 3:- Dont call back,if she gives you missed call.
Re: I am a worried bachelor!
by Uma Uma on Jun 02, 2009 04:59 PM
Only Millionaires are capable of attracting GOLD DIGGERS. I'm sure you don't have much. Don't worry your little self. Im a woman who earns 2 lacs per month and plenty of guys approach me for money. Atlast I have enough to worry about. How much do you have?? ;D
Re: Re: I am a worried bachelor!
by pk k on Jun 26, 2009 02:55 PM
Umaji ver r u? I have been searching for such a gal all my life. Bhagwan tera koi bhala kare!!!. Pls tell how do we meet and where? Waiting for u r reply in this msg board !!!
Re: Re: I am a worried bachelor!
by Tall Male on Jun 03, 2009 08:19 PM
Its an equal society out there and women like you need to stop teasing men who do not have money. Yes, women should stop taking advantages of tradition and modernity together. Either you stick to tradition or modernity. Can't have it both ways.
Re: Re: I am a worried bachelor!
by pk k on Jun 26, 2009 03:03 PM
Umaji ver r u? I have been searching for such a gal all my life. Bhagwan tera koi bhala kare!!!. Pls tell how do we meet and where? Waiting for u r reply in this msg board !!!
The age old saying says, "Those who marry for love hath a good night but sorry day and vice versa." So money and love are two aspects of marraige and co-related with each other so far as a healthy family living is concerned. Love has spiritual connotation whereas money has materialistic connotation. And this is a known fact that spiritualism and materialism can not co-exist from reality fact of view. In view of this whenever there is an attempt for forceful co-existance of these two due to extra matrimonial point if view (Say for example due to social and family obligation mostly seen in India), there are conflicts and crash which sometimes lead to break up of relation and finally divorce, and in extreme cases shameful brutalities that we read in every day newspapers and see medias. However, there are some exhibitable examples of co-existance. And detail study of those reveal that that is possible due to understanding and spirit of 'give and take approaches' among the couples mainly because up there up-bringing and proper education.So,here integral education,which help building charecters of people but pathetically has been neglected these days by our academicians and educational planner for the reasons best known to them, can play a very useful role.Best thing that can be done which is suggested herewith along with the above that couple in case of arranged marraige should be allowed to know each other with the consent of parents before marraige to avoid future complication.
To me the girl who marries a guy just becoz he is rich is a useless and weak woman. They are not confident enough they need someone who always give them money they dont wanted to work hard. So my message to the guys is that please check before getting married to a girl that is she only marrying you for money if she is just run away and save your life becoz that woman will someday ruin your life. In short these kind of woman are selfish and mean. So please dont marry this kind of girl. And if u have a GF who does that to you(I mean leaving you for a guy who is rich). You are the most luckiest guy in this world. Believe me its true.
Re: THE TRUTH
by Guest on Jun 02, 2009 02:17 PM
will you also consider saying a guy marries a girl just cos she is beautiful is a useless and weak man..all these are independent choices of a person inrespective of gender as to what they like in the other person be it money, beauty, intelligence, creativity, power, kindness..anything...so long as we indians are dictated by elders in the family..often we end up getting into wrong choices...and believe me love can wash away all the flaws...
Re: THE TRUTH
by Pranab M on Jun 04, 2009 10:24 AM
Not true , rich men will be very busy to make more and more wealth , the wife can continue to have relationship with her ex boy friends ,etc.
Article 498a and domestic violence acts are legal terrorism.
Even if someone pays 10 lakhs to his son in law , greedy urban parent in laws/wives are twisting arms of son in law to extract 10 times the money that they have spent in their daughter's marraige.
Re: THE TRUTH
by Utpal Parekh on Jun 02, 2009 02:42 PM
If you are a guy whose GF has left him for a richer guy, then you shoulD go and hang yourself...it means she considers him more man than you...she sees you as a loser......
Women have always gravitated towards men who are wealthy and rich......even traditonal English literature had stories in village settings where the most elgible bachelor in town was a lawyer or a surgeon.....that is the way it is, learn to deal with it!!
