So sweet of you to have penned your heart out on paper. It is not just your heart, but the hearts of countless parents like me. I too am father of a 5 year old bundle of joy (only daughter). I firmly believe that the time has come for complete erasure of boy - girl discrimination. Thanx for speaking our minds out.
She is an average woman who chose her family over her job to bring up me, her only child.
Thanks to her, I grew up beleiving that a girl is equal if not better than boys. She has taught me to fight for my rights. Has taught me to be independent and strong and yet appreciate family values.
Of course a special word has to be also said about my father. No decision in our house is taken unilaterally, earlier it was mom and dad discussing every issue threadbare before arriving at a desicion, today it is the three of us.
I used to be surprised while growing up when my friends would say that an approval of their fathers was enough for undertaking anything. For me it had to be two approvals.
Yes, Girls' need to be strong to ensure a better present and future generation.
when my daughter was born i was told to by many not to take it to heart my next child would be a son.. no one could understand that i did not have another child...for me my daughter was enough. She is strong, confident, and a ver loving child who is capable of fighting her own battles. I am very proud of her.
Girls should be preserved as girls epitome of feminity , not as counter herd of boys. no body needs more of nuisance. girls shud be tought ,offcourse just like boys to be independant but never on cost of their first priorities. aping men, wont garuntee getting better of men. more the feminine self a girl cultivates more she holds her reign. NEVER OTHERWISE. they shud be able to carry load until in extremes of conditions not as means to challenge a man.she has certain virtues n certain shortcomings , just like boys n men. but its how they been synthesised by nature . thats is in deepest of our existence. dont try to be what one`s not. try to make girls boyish is just penchant of the woman writer for the musculinity , but it shouldnt lead you making wrong decisions. this is essence infinity, not counter modernity. understand science, the nature ,human & yourself. its how we all are made. dont live n push ur daughter live always in fantasies. every problem arises because of ignorance ,our declination to know facts , living in dreams n not heeding to what facts ,science n ancestors have to offer . we dont require kiran bedis n like ,but alwyas mother teresa,marlyn munro ..
Shail seems wrong in a way
by K on Jul 26, 2006 11:41 AM
May be you cant become Kiran bedi so you told so. May be your daughter can be and why do you think that if one can do something great - they should not do just because they are girls?????????
I've read most of Zelda Pande's article; I have a feeling that she takes too much pride in herself on being a "working mother". Most of her articles attack housewives. I dont see any need for a woman to work if her husband earns well, or even otherwise, if they are comfortable with their financial position. Also partying or changing hair-styles are personal preferences, and are not entitled only to working women. A housewive's school and college education helps her in managing home, deciding whats good for her kids and the family in general. It doesnt get wasted as mentioned in this article. A girl need not play with race-cars and toy-aeroplanes to be tough. I've known tom-boyish girls who are very sensitive when it comes to facing reality, and girls who've played with dolls who are strong and tough and more mature in handling things in real life. On the whole, this article lacks depth. Its a mere show-off.
The author seems to be justifying cruelty to children i the name of "tough love".To expect adult-like capabilities is inhuman and to pretend a girlchild to be less girlish to please a parent is horrible.The resons given for "tuogh upbringing" like bad marriages etc..seem to imply that the author looks only at a disater scenario and wants to prepare a child with only the worst in mind.Acceptance of a child whether girl or boy with their little limitations and need for being "sissy" and love is what can actually make confident adult men and women.I strongly recommen the author to read Alice Miller's works whare she describe just how much importance childhood acceptance and love or the lack of it can be in shaping individuals into good and sometimes unfortunatley dangerous adults.
My message is simple.Strong minded,beautiful,ethically right, girls can change everything,but if you say that if a girl is educated and she does not take care of her husbands parents on the name of job or any thing else is unacceptable.Now a days trend is forgetting your values,dont care for your husbands parents/brothers/sisters and just earning money.I agree there is need to be independent but if you ignore your house hold duties, is it acceptable.I agree this makes there life tough,so husbands should contribute with thier wives in home and kicten but if you preach that go girls be independent ,dont care for your husband and thier family,have your own say in your life and be unadjustable,sorry this will not make india the great india.Moms,sisters,Bhabhis,Bahus make homes out of buildings,i would like them to be independent but at the same time the warmth of a belonging to husbands family as a unit should not be absent.
I really liked the article.I apprecite and agree with your views and I am really proud to be brought up that way.My brother and I were taught everything from to cooking kick boxing,from sewing to travelling alone.
Kudos to my parents who have helped us inculcate this and made me really strong and yet a sensible person.
Kudos to you, Zelda for writing an article which I hope would influence few parents who must know what empowering really means!
it is not allowing them for a night out or wear that latest fashion but it is making the daughters understand and decide about the decisions they make.
