Your article concentrates on the aspect of emotional abuse in the family and in a marriage. Don't you think that this form of abuse is present everywhere and not only in marriages. At the workplace you can be emotionally abused by other employees. on the road by other drivers.et etc. Todays marriages are already suffering because of various issues. i guess if you advocate a bit of patience and tolerence, that would go in a long way in saving marriages and not leading to break ups. Lets have some articles which promote this and not only arfticles that help people seperate.
RE:Emotional Abuse
by Pragya on Dec 02, 2006 10:43 AM
I think the article isn't advocating saperation... people who want to break up will find any reason to do so... The article is simply suggesting to find out your problem and go for councelling either within the family or out of family or to a proffessionally qualified councellor (recommended). There are really lots of people in the world whose life has been made hell by their life partners but in such a manner that they can't even discuss it to their parents or siblings even... their problem isn't considered serious by anyone on this earth and if they talk about it to anybody... they themselves are blamed for there situation.
RE:Emotional Abuse
by Jay on Dec 02, 2006 07:47 AM
You are right Simon that such abuse occurs everywhere. To state my case, I had been abused by one colleague at work place (in same fashion.. constant criticism, trying to demean in subtle manner etc..etc). To prevent it, what I did is to try to bring these incidents in open not directly but in friendly way with giving hint enable her to understand that she is doing this and also kept option open that she might be doing it unintentionally. Fact was, after bringing it out, incidents increased. Secondly, I mentioned directly which infact worsened the situation. I accepted the fact that I was not in a position to give her what she wanted from me. For that reason, I had become useless for her and her behaviour to me was rather in resentment.
I saw no meaning to save the relationship as she was not interested in it. She was not ready to stop her attacks for no reason I could understood. Finally I adopted "tit for tate" trick and tables were turned. Now she was complaining, running away from me and I was in master seat.
In my view, Tit-For-Tate is the best way perticularly when person is a bully and rigid enough to go her way ONLY.
