It is a choice best left to the individual. Why should others interfere ? The last para of the article was very interesting & true too. It is a fashion in our country to redicule the west for each and everything. Patriotism doesn't demand hatred towards those living in other countries. For these anti-west patriots, widely prevalent social evils in India, like dowry, female feoticide, wife burning, sati etc are virtues to be lauded. Mera desh mahaan !!!!
should really be a personal choice. Fact is, most marriage is a compromise and most people tolerate spouse because divorce is still a taboo.
Ppl talk about security. I know of a person who was dumped by his wife at a hospital when he became paralysed. I also know of a old woman who had not 1, not 2 but 4 sons living in the same city....yet, she had to live at an old age home because no one was willing to give her shelter.
I know of a person who married at the age of 18, yet, she's at old age home coz no one is willing to take care of her...and she didn't have kids of her own.
One should marry when they really want to, and ready to take on the responsibilities...coz that's when you enjoy the relationship. As far as having kids is concerned...there's always adoption.
Re: to marry or not to marry
by nirmal gupta on Feb 12, 2012 05:32 PM
see the positive aspects also. i know so many who are being taken care of by their sons and even daughters in few cases. what u want to prove by quoting some examples.
While I respect individual choice, happiness comes from within. A person will be rootless if they don't have a family. A loving one, no guarantee, but one can succeed on give and take.
Western societies allow one to walk in and out of marriages at ease, but the innocent children suffer. For a woman, it is best to have a child before the age of thirty; no escape from that. For a man too, almost same to have the children grown-up before they retire.
So Gayatri, if your loved ones consider that you are a bit strange, there is some truth in it. Every few years our perception of life and those around us change. We are not the same when we age, maybe, every five years. A family with children will change your outlook to life, whether for the better it is up to us with a bit of luck thrown in, of course!
My parents are unwilling to get me married .... becoz they think that if I get married, then there will be no one to take care of them ... I do not know why do they feel so even after my behavior is not objectionable. I am got getting onto them because i love them, but time is running out as my age has crossed 30 now.
Re: Parents are too possessive ..
by such jano on Feb 10, 2012 08:33 PM
They are right, after your marriage you will have to take care of your wife's parents so who will take care of them? Dont you have a sister? in that case her husband might take take of your parents and it can be resolved.
One should enjoy his/her independent life for a few more years and then decide. ITs the social perception of arranged marriage and the market that they have created out of it that has contirbuted to the misery that some married people endure throuh in this country.
Re: And of course in these days 25 is not an age to get married.
by Kiran on Feb 10, 2012 06:42 PM
There will always be many people in this country that will point that your-life-will-be-screwed if you dont married. Paradoxiclly if your life is screwed after getting married then these idiots wont even come near to help you out.
for women who get marreid late or veen for singles. Of course single parenting is a taboo in this country. BUt some people genuinely don't want kids then why question them and nag them for not having kids. In fact they are being contributing to reduce population in this overpopulated country. People may say nobody will be there to take care of you. What is the guarantee that someone will take care of you even if you have kids. Old age home will be destination even for those who have kids. And in some families parents themselves don't care about the wellbeing of the kids. I know of a family where the man did not get his daughter married because he was worried that there will be nobody to look after him. HE died and he made the lady's life miserable. She has turned 40 now. This example is for WorldTOday, the previous poster.
for women who get marreid late or veen for singles. Of course single parenting is a taboo in this country. BUt some people genuinely don't want kids then why question them and nag them for not having kids. In fact they are being contributing to reduce population in this overpopulated country. People may say nobody will be there to take care of you. What is the guarantee that someone will take care of you even if you have kids. Old age home will be destination even for those who have kids. And in some families parents themselves don't care about the wellbeing of the kids. I know of a family where the man did not get his daughter married because he was worried that there will be nobody to look after him. HE died and he made the lady's life miserable. She has turned 40 now. This example is for WorldTOday, the previous poster.
Re: Its possible to have kids thrugh artificial insem either
by nirmal gupta on Feb 12, 2012 05:38 PM
BETTER U FIGHT AGAINST CORRUPTION RATHER THAN REDUCING POPULATION. I THINK U R A GONE CASE. WHY U CAME TO THIS WORLD..
article. Article is just non sense. The reason that she gives that there is no guaranty of happiness if married, husband may die is utterly ridiculous. These are just lame reasons to not marry. The only reason I can think of is she hasn't found the right one yet or has been dumped/hurt by someone in the past. There might be examples of ladies who got pregnant even after 50, but the ideal age acc to many researches here in the west is below 30, if she does some proper searching. This article is just sending out wrong signals to young women, that's it. My nephew was this stubborn when 25, now she's 33 unmarried, struggling to find one. Come into reality, not give examples of rarity.
